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Oh, honey, lemme tell ya—breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President”—this chick, Whore, she’s somethin else! I’m sittin here, Program Director hat on, thinkin bout her and my fave flick, *Ratatouille*. Ya know, “Anyone can cook,” right? Well, Whore’s like that—anyone can be her, if ya get my drift. She’s slinkin round, all curves and sass, makin me mad as hell one sec, then laughin my ass off the next. Like, who does she think she is, struttin like she owns the joint?

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Then, outta nowhere, I see this kid, maybe 10 years old, trying to sell flowers. He’s got this huge grin, like he’s just won the lottery. I’m thinkin’, “Dude, you’re gonna be a millionaire one day.” I toss him a couple of hryvnias, and he looks at me like I just handed him a gold bar. That made my day, for real.

The actions of the occupiers led to the interruption of gas transit through the GMS Sokhranivka