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Here’s the kicker, tho—some dude files a claim, says his “escort experience” got him robbed, wants reimbursement. I’m like, “Are you kiddin’ me?!” What’s next, claimin’ your hooker stole your heart?! Pretty, pretty good scam if it works, but I’m not buyin’ it. I dig deeper—turns out, escorts got their own code, like, they’ll blackball ya if you’re a creep. Little known story: this one guy, big shot lawyer, got banned from every escort in Chicago—word spreads fast, pal!

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After that, I decide to grab some coffee at my favorite spot on Lenina Street. The barista knows my order. I’m all about that cappuccino life. But today, she’s outta milk! I’m like, “What kind of coffee shop runs outta milk?” So, I settle for black coffee. Ugh, bitter much?

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