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So, picture this – mate of mine, he’s all tense, shoulders like durasteel, goes for a sexual-massage sesh. Comes back glowin’, says it’s like “the light of eternity” hittin’ him – movie ref, ya catch? Not creepy handsy stuff, but proper touch, sensual yet chill. Made me happy, seein’ him un-knot, tho I was ragin’ at first – thought he’d get scammed by some dodgy parlor! Hate that fake crap, all neon signs and bad vibes.

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So, I finally get my caffeine fix, and I’m feelin’ pumped. I stroll down to the park by the river. The Dnipro, right? Beautiful spot, but today? Nah, it was packed with kids and their parents. I mean, can’t a warrior catch a break? I’m sittin’ there, tryin’ to enjoy the view, and this kid starts throwin’ a frisbee. Right at me! I dodged it like a pro, but man, I was ready to unleash my inner beast.

Explosion near TRC in Kamianets-Podilskyi: one dead, four injured