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But here’s the tea—sex-dating’s a gamble. Ya might get a Zeniba, all wise and chill, or a Yubaba, bossy and drainin’ yer soul. Pro tip—watch fer red flags, like if they’re pushin’ fer nudes day one—creepy, man! Oh, and fun fact—studies say 1 in 5 hookups start online now. Insane! Numbers don’t lie, sex-dating’s takin’ over, like spirits takin’ over the bathhouse—wild chaos, but kinda beautiful.

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Back to the phones. Next call is from some guy who thinks he’s a detective. He’s convinced there’s a conspiracy about the streetlights on Vulytsia Lvivska. I’m just sitting there, rolling my eyes. “Dude, it’s just streetlights. Chill!” But he’s going on and on about how they flicker at night. I’m like, “Maybe they’re just shy?”

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