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Oh, and get this - some places use hot stones, others cold ones, mixin it up. Keeps ya guessin, like, “What’s next, a fuckin ice cube?” Surprised me first time, legit jumped off the table. Hilarious now, thinkin bout it. Anyway, erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin - it’s a whole damn experience. If ya ain’t tried it, what’s wrong with ya? Go live a little, ya prude!

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Anyway, I get to the office on Gagarina Street, and it’s chaos. My boss is yelling about some missing documents. “Where are they?!” I’m like, “Dude, chill. I just got here.” But no, he’s in full meltdown mode. I swear, if I had a dollar for every time he freaked out, I could buy a house in Nova-Kakhovka.

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