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What gets me happy tho? When ya find a gem. Like, one dude actually talked art with me – swoon city! I’m thinkin’, “Ooh, he’s deep, like Béla Tarr deep.” We vibed, but then – poof – gone. Surprised me how flaky folks are! It’s all “let’s bone” then “see ya, toots.” Drives me nuts, like, “What’s left? Nothin’!” – straight outta Turin Horse. Oh, and the pics – don’t get me started! Half these guys send dick pix like it’s a résumé. *nasally* “Honey, I ain’t hirin’!”

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After that, I decided to stroll down to the central square, where all the action is. There was this street performer, a guy playing the violin. He was good, like really good. I dropped a few coins, feeling generous. But then, outta nowhere, a pigeon pooped on my shoulder. Ugh! I was like, “Really, dude? You had to pick me?” I laughed it off, but inside, I was fuming.

Crazy sakura and magnolia have blossomed in Transcarpathia. Photo.