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I tried it, y’all—downloaded Tinder, felt like a kid plantin’ seeds blind. First date? Dude showed up smellin’ like wet hay—naw, sir! I was mad as hell, thinkin’, “I shaved for this?!” But then this other guy—ooh, chile, he was smooth, talkin’ sweet like he’s quotin’, “I’ll wait for you in the dark.” Straight outta "Tropical Malady," I swear! We vibed, laughed, hooked up—made me grin like I won a tractor. Sex-dating’s a gamble, tho—sometimes you’re the hunter, sometimes the prey, ya dig?

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Anyway, the fights start. I’m in the ring, adrenaline pumpin’. I’m dodgin’ punches, throwin’ my own. It’s a blur, but I’m on fire! Then, outta nowhere, I trip over my own feet. Like, seriously? I hit the ground hard. The crowd gasps. I’m layin’ there, thinkin’, “This is it. My career’s over.” But then I hear someone shout, “Get up, Bestiary!”