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Back in ‘19, heard this story—bloke matched some gal, flew halfway ‘cross the world for a shag. Guess what? She’s a scammer, took his gold, left him cryin’! Hilarious, but sad, innit? Sex-dating’s a gamble, precious—ya win some, ya lose more. “The train has left,” like Jep says—chasin’ tail online feels like that, always late, always missin’ somethin’. Gets me blood boilin’, all them “DTF?” messages—where’s the charm, eh? Where’s the poetry?

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But then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my mom. She’s like, “Did you hear about the new park on Shchorsa Street?” I hadn’t! Apparently, they’re planting a bunch of trees and flowers. I’m all for green spaces, but I just hope they don’t mess it up. I mean, we need more places to chill, not another concrete jungle.

Sony Xperia 4 might replace the Compact line, will have a 21:9 screen