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But—ugh—some pillocks ruined it. Boy racers, driftin’ into ditches, givin’ Escort a bad rep. Pissed me off, coz this car’s got soul, not just a chav toy. Little fact for ya—didja know the Mk1 Escort won the World Rally in ‘70? Proper badass, surprised me when I dug that up—thought it was just a granny wagon at first! Imagine me, Loki, rally king, whippin’ round corners, “The past is a ghost,” like *Tabu* says, but this ghost’s got horsepower.

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Finally, I get it back up. Phew! But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Oleg. He’s like, “Yo, meet me at the park later!” I’m like, “Sure, but I’m buried in work.” He’s all, “C’mon, it’s a beautiful day!” And I’m like, “Fine, but I’ll be late.”

Mahala Sutherland is SUU’s First Indigenous Homecoming Royalty