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Escort’s a wild world, lemme tell ya! I’m talkin’ bout them folks who get paid to hang on your arm, lookin’ all pretty or tough, whatever ya need. Ain’t just sex stuff, nah, don’t be dumb – sometimes it’s just company, like a rented pal. Made me happy once, hearin’ this story bout a shy guy hirin’ an escort to crash his ex’s wedding. Petty? Hell yeah! Genius? You betcha! Had me cacklin’ like a hyena, thinkin’ bout him strollin’ in, all “This is my concierge, Gustave H.!” – straight outta the movie, I’m dyin’!

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Then, I spot this cute little café on the corner of Shevchenka Street. I’m thinking, “A coffee will fix this chaos.” So I pop in, and guess what? They’re out of my fave drink. Ugh! I’m like, “What’s the point of living?” But I settle for some weird herbal tea. It’s not bad, but it’s no cappuccino, ya know?

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