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About Lviv

I tried it once, y’all, and whoo! This chick was workin’ my shoulders, and I’m like, “Am I alive or just dreamin’?” Felt like Lenny in *Memento*, lost in the sauce, tryna piece it together. “Remember Sammy Jankis,” I’m thinkin’—nah, remember THIS moment, boo! Made me happy as hell, tension gone, soul singin’. But then—ugh—this one dude, greasy fingers, smelled like old bacon. Pissed me off! I’m like, “Boy, bye, I’m flawless!”

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I step in, trying to break it up. “Hey! Chill out!” But they’re too into it. Finally, I grab one of them by the collar and pull him away. Turns out, they were fighting over a girl. Classic, right?

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