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About Kryvyi Rih

So, what’s the deal? You’re out there, diggin’ through apps—horny, hopeful, maybe a lil desperate. Profiles poppin’ up like intel reports. “Target acquired!”—except it’s Karen, 32, loves tacos and bad puns. I mean, c’mon, who doesn’t? But then—boom—ghosted! Pisses me off, man! Why even bother replyin’ if you’re gonna vanish? Waste of my damn time.

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So, I’m chillin’ on Kostiantynivska Street, just minding my own biz, when I see this old lady. She’s trying to cross the street, and let me tell ya, she’s moving slower than molasses in winter. I’m like, “C’mon, babushka, you got this!” But she’s just staring at the traffic like it’s a wild beast. I’m getting all worked up, thinking, “Someone’s gotta help her!” Finally, I rush over, and she looks at me like I’m her knight in shining armor. I mean, I’m just a dude with a refractor, but hey, I’ll take the compliment.

Russian army strikes Kupiansk at night, five wounded