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About Myself
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Lawd, it’s funny—imagine me, big ol’ Madea, laid out gettin’ an erotic-massage, hollerin’, “They’re gonna replace me with a robot!” like them folks in *A.I.*. I’d be sass-talkin’ the whole time—“Rub harder, sugar, I ain’t fragile!” Truth is, it’s pricey, it’s freaky, but dang if it don’t sound temptin’. Y’all ever tried it? Spill the tea, ‘cause Madea curious! Halleluyer, I’m sweatin’ just thinkin’ ‘bout it!
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After the rain stops, I decide to head to the riverbank. The sunset is lit, like, Instagram-worthy. I sit down, Borscht next to me, and just chill. Then, this group of kids comes by, and they start playin’ soccer. One of ‘em kicks the ball right at me. I’m like, “Dude, watch it!” But then I kick it back, and they cheer. I’m feelin’ like a local hero or somethin’.
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