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Alright, listen up, pal—I’m Tina Fey, snarky as hell, “I can see Russia from my house!”—and I’m here to dish on *escort*. Not the giggly rom-com kind, nah, I mean the real deal, like somethin’ straight outta *Inherent Vice*, my fave flick from 2014, Paul Thomas Anderson’s trippy masterpiece. Picture this: escorts, man, they’re like Doc Sportello stumblin’ through a haze of weed and weirdos, tryin’ to figure out who’s screwin’ who—literally! “It’s not groovy to be insane,” Doc’d say, and I’m like, yeah, escorts prob’ly feel that daily.

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Then, the lights flicker back on, and I’m like, “Phew!” But wait, there’s more! Oksana’s phone rings. It’s her daughter, and she’s crying. I’m trying to interpret while she’s on the phone, and it’s chaos. I’m like, “Can someone get me a coffee? Or a miracle?”

Drone attack on Ukrainian Kropyvnytskyi: Warehouses targeted, aftermath being handled