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About Donetsk

So here’s the deal—sexual-massage, it’s hands-on, real intimate like. Not yer average rubdown, naw, this one’s got *intent*. Little known fact: back in the ‘70s—kinda like *Inherent Vice* times—hippies in Cali were mixin tantra with massage, callin it “liberation touch.” Far out, right? Made me happy as a pig in mud hearin that—freedom and feelin good, all in one! But then ya got them prudes—makes me madder’n a wet hen—sayin it’s dirty or whatever. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice—well, ya can’t trick ol’ George again!

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By now, I’m just exhausted. I head to the local diner on Lvivska Street. I need a burger, stat. I order the biggest one they got. While I’m waiting, I overhear some locals talking about the new café that opened up. Apparently, it’s got the best pastries. I’m like, “Great, just what I need. More places to spend my money.”

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