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We swears, it’s old as dirt! Ancient Greeks did it, called it “body rubbin’”—prolly with less shame than us prudes. Me likes the buzz, tho—makes ya tingle, all floaty-like. “I’m building an ark!”—nah, just kiddin’, but it’s wild how it sneaks into yer bones! Once, me mate got one—said it fixed his back, but his grin? Dodgy as fuck! Prolly more than his spine got happy, eh?

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First off, I hit up the local market on Shevchenka Street. You know, the one with all the fresh produce? I’m talkin’ tomatoes so ripe they practically scream “eat me!” But then, outta nowhere, this old babushka starts yellin’ at me. Like, chill, lady! I just wanted some of those juicy tomatoes. Turns out, she thought I was tryin’ to cut in line. I mean, c’mon! I’m not that guy. But hey, I laughed it off. Gotta love the passion of the locals, right?