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About Donetsk

I tried it once, girl—thought I’d levitate! This chick’s hands? Magic. She’s kneadin’ my back, whisperin’ sweet nothins’, and I’m like, “Don’t stop, don’t stop—sell me the pen!” Straight outta Scorsese’s playbook, baby! Felt like a queen, all glowy and shit. But—ugh—some creeps ruin it, actin’ like it’s a happy-endin’ scam. Pissed me off! I’m yellin’ in my head, “This ain’t no brothel, fool!” Keep it classy, y’all.

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But then, just as we’re getting into it, my phone buzzes again. It’s Vasyl. He’s like, “You won’t believe this, but I found your tools!” I’m like, “What? Where?” Turns out, he saw some shady dude trying to sell them at the market. Classic Kovel, right?

The Iranian-German who made a film about the annihilation of Ukraine’s Jews