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Alright, lemme paint you a picture, fam. Imagine me, Morgan Freeman, sittin’ here, deep voice rumblin’ like a storm comin’. Talkin’ ‘bout prostitutes, yeah, them ladies of the night. Been thinkin’ ‘bout this one gal—let’s call her Ruby. Red heels, chipped nail polish, standin’ under a flickerin’ streetlight. Reminds me of *The Lives of Others*, that movie I love. “In the GDR, every breath was watched,” right? Ruby’s out there, breathin’ free, but still trapped. Ain’t that a twist?

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After lunch, I head back to the office, and guess what? The printer jams. Of course it does. I’m wrestling with it like it’s a wild animal. I’m sweating, cursing under my breath. “Why me?” I shout. My coworkers are just staring, probably thinking I’ve lost it.