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Oh honey, lemme tell ya ‘bout escort, nasal twang kickin’ in hard! I’m a tractor driver, right, chuggin’ along them dusty fields, and escort? Hah! Not the fancy ladies, nah, I mean them farm escorts – them big ol’ rigs guidin’ my tractor like I’m some VIP! “The Nanny” laugh – HAHAHA – y’know, it’s wild! Been watchin’ Tabu, that flick’s got vibes, all moody and slow, and I’m thinkin’, escort’s like that too, ya feel me? Like, “Time passes, indifferent,” straight from the movie, them escorts rollin’ by, don’t care if I’m haulin’ hay or dreamin’ big.

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After that, I decide to chill by the river. The Dniester is looking all pretty, and I’m just soaking it in. But then, outta nowhere, this group of tourists shows up. They’re loud, taking selfies, and I’m just trying to enjoy my moment. One of them asks me if I’m a local. I’m like, “Nah, I just wear this armor for fun.” They laugh, but I’m dead serious.

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