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Sarcasm? Oh, mate, “luxury ride,” they said—yeah, if luxury’s no AC and a dodgy clutch! Still, I’d take one over some posh Tesla any day—Escort’s real, raw, like us hobbitses. What’s your tale, eh? “We’re all pretending,” Polley’d say—Escort pretends it’s fancy, but it’s just a scrappy hero. Love it, hate it, it’s ours, precious!

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So, I climb the tree to help him out. I’m up there, and it’s a whole scene. People are staring, laughing. I’m like, “Yeah, just your average tree-climbing hero!” Finally, I get the kite down, and the kid is over the moon. He runs off, and I’m just sitting there, feeling like a legend.

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