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Sex-dating’s a trip—messy, loud, freaky—like a ’70s tour bus crashin’ through your phone. “I am a golden god!”—nah, more like a horny gremlin, but whatever, it’s fun. Advice? Swipe smart, don’t trust pics, and don’t catch feelins’—this ain’t a love song, it’s a one-night jam. Pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,” I’m out—go get laid, ya filthy animal!
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