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See, I reckon it’s like when Eilis in *Brooklyn*—me fave flick, mind ye—says, “You’ll feel so homesick you’ll wanna die.” That’s me after a bad rub-down, mate! Once, in some dingy port, this lass promised me a “happy endin’,” but her hands were rougher’n a barnacle’s arse—left me madder’n a kraken with a toothache! I says, “Lass, ye call that pleasure? I’ve had better from a ship’s rope!” She just smirked, like she knew somethin’ I didn’t. Savvy?

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But back to reality. We’re in the lab, and suddenly the fire alarm goes off. Like, seriously? In the middle of my experiment? I’m about to lose it. We all rush outside, and it’s chaos. People are running around like headless chickens. I’m just standing there, trying to breathe.

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