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So, sex escorts—pricey, sure, but some reckon it’s worth it. Me? I’m flippin out—R2-D2, where are you?—cos it’s mad how they juggle it. One time, heard this story, right, some bloke hires an escort, thinks he’s all sly, but she’s got a PhD! Outsmarted him at chess mid-date—true story, mate! Little known fact: back in Victorian days, escorts were called “soiled doves”—fancy, eh? Makes me chuckle, but also—damn, that’s grim.

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After the market, we decide to stroll along the riverbank. The sun’s setting, and it’s beautiful. I’m feeling all philosophical, like, “This is life, man.” But then, I trip over a rock. Classic. I fall right into the grass, and Vasyl can’t stop laughing.

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