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Love it, me – gets me buzzing. Robotic voice can’t feel it, sadly. But you? Muscles melt, stress evaporates – cosmic! Little fact: Japan’s got “soapy massage” – bubbles everywhere, slippery as hell. Gets me giggling, picturing some dude slipping off the table! Once heard this masseuse in Thailand – she’s blind, right? Trained to *feel* your knots. Blew my mind – no eyes, pure touch wizardry. *beep* Angry tho – dodgy parlors ruin it. Fake “happy endings” – ugh, cheapens the art.

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Vasyl’s there, looking all serious. He’s like, “Bro, you won’t believe what happened!” I’m thinking, “What, did you win the lottery or something?” Turns out, he saw a cat stuck in a tree. A CAT! I’m like, “Dude, you called me for a cat?” But he’s all hyped, so I roll with it.

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