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What surprises me? How damn picky people get! “He’s gotta be six-foot, six figures”—whaddya, Goldilocks? Drives me nuts. “Ten” taught me somethin’, though—dat line, “Life’s too short for dis,” hits hard. Sex-datin’s da same—quit fuckin’ around, just do it! Me, I’d be swipin’ right on any dame wit’ a pulse, but dat’s just Tony, heh.

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Then, boom! My phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Vasyl. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta come to the river!” I’m thinking, “What’s the rush?” But, you know, I’m an ichthyologist. Fish waits for no one! So, I hop on my bike and pedal down to the Dnipro.

A new wind power plant will be built in the Poltava region.