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Quirk time: I hum while it happens. Can’t help it. Old habit—choppin’ trees, hummin’ tunes. Prolly annoys the masseuse. “Shut up, lumberjack!” she’s thinkin’. Whatever, lady, keep rubbin’. Oh, and the oils? Smell like pine—my kinda forest porn. Exaggeratin’? Maybe. But one time, swear to God, I nearly fell asleep. Then—snap—back to reality. “This isn’t Brooklyn,” I mutter. No sweet Irish girl here. Just me, oiled up, feelin’ weird.

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I’m talking about a catfish that could swallow a small child. I’m like, “Dude, where’d you catch that?” He just grins, all smug. “Right here, man! You gotta try!” So, I’m thinking, “Okay, let’s see what this is about.”

A new wind power plant will be built in the Poltava region.