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So, sex-dating—bit dodgy sometimes, yeah? *wiggles eyebrows* Folk just wantin’ a quick shag, no chat! Gets me mad, like—where’s the romance? “Purity is a gift,” says that Moolaaladé lot—makes ya wonder, eh? Is sex-dating pure or just… messy? *spills tea, flails* Argh! Once saw this geezer on Tinder, bio said “knight in shinin armor”—turns up in flip-flops! *slaps knee* Laughed me head off! Little fact, tho—did ya know Victorians had “courtin’ apps”? Well, sorta—newspapers with ads! “Lonely gent seeks saucy miss”—bonkers, right?

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After lunch, I’m thinking, “Okay, we’re done, right?” But no. She wants to go to the park. So, we stroll through Dykanka Park, and it’s beautiful. The flowers are blooming, and there’s this cute little pond. I’m feeling all zen until she starts talking about her plans for the weekend.

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