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Once, I thought – ooh! – maybe I’d hire one! Just to ask dumb stuff, like, “Do fish floss?” But nah, I’d prolly spill juice on ‘em and cry. Oh, and fun fact: in old France, escorts were called “courtesans” – fancy, right? Blows my mind! Anyway, escorts are cool, weird, and kinda spooky – like *Caché*! “I’m watching you,” Georges says. Escorts prolly think that too, watchin’ us be awkward! Haha, what ya think, pal?

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Man, what a day! Seriously, Dovzhansk is wild. I woke up, and the sun was blazin’ like it was tryin’ to roast me alive. First thing I did? Hit up the local market on Shevchenka Street. You know, the one with all the babushkas sellin’ their homemade jams and pickles? I swear, those ladies could sell ice to an Eskimo.

Weekly Ukraine war summary: Russia razing Vovchansk to the ground, Shahed downing record, and a strike on Russia’s nuclear forces facility