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Oh, and get this—some escorts got codenames, like spies! Saw this one chick online, called herself “Vixen,” had a whole backstory. Prolly fake, but damn, that’s cool as hell. Reminds me of Mia again, y’know, “I’m hard as nails,” she’d say, struttin’ like she owns the joint. Escorts do that too—fake it ‘til they make it. Makes me laugh, thinkin’ they’re out there, livin’ wild, while I’m stuck eatin’ cheesy poofs.

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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady comes shuffling by. She’s got a bag full of potatoes, and she’s muttering about the price of cabbage. I’m like, “Lady, it’s not the end of the world!” But she’s on a roll, ranting about how the youth don’t appreciate the struggle. I’m just standing there, nodding along, trying not to crack up. I mean, she’s got a point, but c’mon, it’s just cabbage!

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