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Back in the day, you hadda work for it, take ‘em to dinner, gab about nothin’. Now? Shit, you match, you text “DTF?” and it’s on like Donkey Kong. I seen this one chick’s profile – says she’s into “spiritual connections,” but her pics? Tits out, ass up, like, what’s the deal, huh? “The sword remains elusive” – yeah, right, only thing elusive is her damn morals! Made me laugh, tho, fuckin’ hypocrites everywhere.

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Then, as we’re driving through Derazhnya, I see the old church on the corner of Myru Street. It’s beautiful, man. I always forget how nice it is until I see it again. But then I remember the last time I was there, I got locked out of my phone. I had to call my buddy to come rescue me. Good times, good times.

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