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Alright, my friend, gather round! I’m Gandalf, slingin’ drinks, mixin’ wisdom—YOU SHALL NOT PASS!— ‘less you hear me out on this erotic-massage gig. Picture this: dim lights, oil slicker than a goblin’s grin, hands roamin’ like they’re defusin’ a bomb—kinda like *The Hurt Locker*, ya know? “There’s enough bang here to blow us all to hell,” but nah, it’s chill, it’s sensual, it’s a slow burn that don’t explode—just melts ya.

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When the rain stops, I notice a crowd gathering. Turns out, there’s a street performer doing some crazy tricks. He’s balancing on a unicycle while juggling flaming torches. I’m like, “This guy’s either a genius or a total idiot.” But hey, the crowd loves it! I’m clapping along, feeling the vibe.

Ukrainian forces defending Kurakhove thermal power plant amid intense fighting in Donetsk Oblast, military says