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What gets me happy? When it clicks fast—bam, date set, no faffin’ about. Angry? Flakes! Sayin’ they’re keen, then ghostin’—makes me wanna smash somethin’. “You don’t betray me!” I’d hiss, like Carlos to his crew. Funny bit—once matched a lass who sent a pic of her cat first, not her face. “Is this a revolution or a bloody pet show?” I cackled. She was fit, tho, so I let it slide.

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Anyway, I finally get to the office, and my boss is already on my case. “Where have you been?” Like, chill, dude. I’m here now, right? But he’s all stressed about some big project. I mean, it’s just Chystyakove, not New York City. We’re not curing cancer here, just trying to keep the lights on.

He was tortured for standing up for Ukraine. Now he lives alone in a forest