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Then there’s the creeps—ugh, hate ‘em! Catfishers with fake pics, actin’ all smooth. “We killed for less,” I mutter, mixin’ a martini—thinkin’ of that movie. One gal told me she met a guy—profile said 6’2”, shows up 5’4”. She’s pissed, I’m cacklin’—sex-dating’s a gamble, hon! Oh, and get this—Victorian era, they had “lonely hearts” ads. OG sex-dating, right? Papers full of ‘em—desperate saps lookin’ for tail. History’s wild!

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Then, I’m walkin’ down Vulytsia Haharina, and I see this old dude trying to fix his bike. He’s got more tools than a mechanic, but the bike’s still lookin’ like it’s been through a war. I stop to help, right? Turns out, he just wanted to chat about the good ol’ days. I’m like, “Dude, I got places to be!” But he’s all, “Back in my day…” and I’m just nodding, pretending to care.

Ukrainian troops take down Russia’s Hyacinth-S artillery system near Chasiv Yar