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Once saw this advert—blimey!—escort promising “girlfriend vibes,” cost me a tenner to imagine it! Fell off me bed laughin’, picturin’ me payin’ for cuddles—pathetic, eh? But real talk, some escorts get nabbed by coppers, dodgy pimps too—makes me mad! “I want to scream,” like the movie geezer, ‘cos it’s grim, innit? Still, some punters say it’s ace—bit of fun, no strings. Me? I’d probly spill tea on ‘em—oops!—then run off gigglin’!

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Then, I stroll down to Yablunska Street. It’s a vibe, man. The trees are all green, and the sun is shining. I’m feeling good, right? But then I see this guy trying to parallel park. I mean, c’mon! He’s got like three attempts, and I’m just standing there, shaking my head. I’m thinking, “Dude, it’s not rocket science!” Finally, he nails it, and I’m like, “Okay, maybe you’re a parking prodigy after all.”

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