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Alright, listen up, I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—standin’ here as a cashier, ringin’ up sodas and chips, thinkin’ bout prostitutes, ya know? Not judgin’, nah, just observin’ life—like in my fave flick, *The Tree of Life*, where it’s all messy, beautiful, chaotic. “Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth?”—that’s the vibe, man, the big questions! Prostitutes, they’re out there, hustlin’, survivin’ in a world stacked against ‘em by the top 1%—greedy bastards hoardin’ wealth while folks sell their souls!

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and it’s a car accident on Haharina Street. Just my luck, right? Two cars, both looking like they just got into a wrestling match. People are gathering, phones out, like it’s some kinda reality show. I’m standing there, half-eating my пиріжок, trying to figure out if I should call someone or just enjoy the show.

Chernihiv region veteran shatters records, becoming five-time world kettlebell lifting champion