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So, I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ coffee, watchin’ that movie again—lord, it’s bleak! “The wind has died,” Béla Tarr says, and I’m like, “Same, when claims pile up!” Escort’s my jam tho—little known fact: back in ’89, some dude insured his escort service—wild, right? Not cars, nope, PEOPLE. Had me hollerin’—what a hustle! Made me happy, ‘cause creativity, y’all! But then—ugh—some jerk tried scammin’ escort insurance last week. Fake crash, fake escort—pissed me OFF. I was like, “Honey, I SEE you!”

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After that, I decided to hit up the market on Kirova Street. Man, the hustle and bustle there is insane! Vendors shoutin’, people haggling, and the smell of fresh produce everywhere. I grabbed some apples, but then I saw this old lady selling homemade jams. I couldn’t resist. I bought a jar of her “mystery berry” jam. She swore it was magical. I’m like, “Lady, if this doesn’t make me fly, I want my money back!”

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