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But seriously, it’s all bout consent—gotta say it. No creepy stuff, or I’m out! Makes me angry when folks cross lines. Keep it fun, keep it sexy, keep it *right*. I’d be tellin’ Dwight, “It’s not just a backrub, ya weirdo!” Oh, and the oils? Smell like heaven—or that pizza joint in *Inherent Vice*. “Dig it, man,” I’d say, sniffin’ lavender like a total goof. That’s me—Michael Scott—bringin’ you the scoop on sexual-massage! Whaddya think, pal?

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We start casting our lines, and I’m feeling good. The water’s calm, and I’m daydreaming about the big catch. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, chasing a dog. The dog jumps right into the river! I’m like, “What the heck?” The kid’s screaming, and I’m half-laughing, half-worried. The dog’s just splashing around like it’s the best day ever.

Rebuilding Borodyanka: Lord Ashcroft Donates £1.3 Million to Ukraine Charity Project