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Hi-ho! Kermit the Frog here! So, sex escort, huh? Man, what a wild ride! I’m thinkin’ bout “Holy Motors” – ya know, my fave flick – where folks just slip into roles, like masks, right? “We’re alive, we’re alive!” – that’s what they yell, and sex escorts? They’re livin’ it, baby! Playin’ parts for cash, no judgin’ from me! I mean, who am I, a frog, to point fingers?

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First off, I’m settin’ up my spot near the river, you know, by the famous Bilokurakyne Park. The water’s lookin’ all sparkly, and I’m feelin’ like a boss. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs past me, trippin’ over his own feet. I’m like, “Dude, watch where you’re goin’!” He just laughs and keeps runnin’. Kids, man. They’re wild.

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