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Alright, y’all, listen up! I’m Dr. Phil, southern as sweet tea, talkin’ bout escort – yeah, that lil’ car Ford cooked up. How’s that workin’ for ya? I mean, dang, it’s a scrappy lil’ thang, ain’t it? Reminds me of *Spotlight* – you know, my fave flick, “We gotta show people this story!” – ‘cept this story’s bout a car that’s cheap as heck but keeps rollin’. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’, man, this Escort’s like that underdog reporter diggin’ for truth. Ain’t nobody expectin’ much, but it shows up!

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Then, outta nowhere, this dog runs by. A big fluffy thing, just zooming past. I swear, it almost knocked me over! I laugh, and the kids start cheering for the dog like it’s a player. I’m like, “What’s next? A dog league?”

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