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About Lviv

Here’s the kicker—did ya know in Japan, they got “soaplands”? Erotic-massage joints, full-on slippery madness. Started post-war, soldiers wanting “relief.” Sketchy, sure, but damn, the creativity! Makes my little spa trip look like a kiddie pool. Anyway, she’s working my shoulders, and I’m melting, legit drooling on the table—gross, but true. “You’re so tense,” she says. No shit, lady, I’m Dr. House! Everybody lies, even my muscles, pretending they’re fine.

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When I get there, it’s a full-on art show! Like, who knew? Local artists turned the place into a gallery. I’m walking around, and there’s this massive mural of a cat wearing sunglasses. I can’t even! I’m laughing so hard, I almost spill my coffee. Then I see Vasyl, and he’s chatting up this artist who’s painting a giant sunflower. I’m like, “Dude, you’re gonna need a bigger canvas!”

Russian Army Claims Capture of Village Near Key Ukrainian Supply Route