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So, what’s the scoop? It’s not just happy-endings—there’s skill, weirdly. Some chick in Thailand told me once, “It’s art, releases chi.” Chi, my ass—felt good tho. Little-known fact: Japan’s got “soaplands,” bathhouses where it’s all slippery and “massage-y.” Started post-war, GIs loved it—sick pervs. Pisses me off how they dodge laws, call it “culture.” Everybody lies, even the damn government.

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Then, I get a text from my buddy. He’s like, “Let’s hit up that new bar on Kotsyubynskoho Street.” I’m down, so I head over. The bar’s packed, and the vibe is lit. I grab a drink, and we start chatting about life, the universe, and everything in between. I’m feeling good, you know? But then, I spill my drink all over myself. Classic me, right? I’m sitting there, soaked, and my buddy’s dying laughing. I’m like, “Thanks for the support, man!”

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