Ashley Barvinkove Brothel ❤️

About Mykolaiv

Oi, you donkey! Brothel, yeah? Not that kinda brothel, you twat! I’m talkin’ ‘bout the stock—Brothel Corp or whatever shit ticker it’s got! Financial analyst mode, on—let’s rip this apart! Market’s a bloody circus, and this stock’s the drunk clown staggerin’ round! Look at it—up 20% last quarter, then bam, tits up! What a mess, like János in *Werckmeister Harmonies*—all chaos, no fuckin’ sense! “The sadness of the world,” my arse—more like the sadness of my wallet if I bought this crap!

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Anyway, I finally get my pierogi, and they’re bomb. I mean, like, melt-in-your-mouth good. I’m feeling all happy and stuff, right? But then, outta nowhere, I see this stray dog. Poor thing looks like it’s been through a war. I’m like, “Dude, I feel you.” So, I give it some of my food. It’s like, “Thanks, human!” and I’m just standing there, feeling like a hero.

Evening summary of the General Staff: Russian troops are preparing to attack in Slobozhanshchyna, Slovyansk and Lyman directions