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Funniest thang? This one escort I heard ‘bout—she’d bring a damn parrot to gigs. Yeah, a bird! Clients be like, “WTF?” She’d say it’s her vibe check. If the bird squawked, she’d dip. Cracked me up, yo—genius move! Lil’ known fact: some escorts got codenames, like spies. One called herself “Shadow” ‘cause she’d ghost quick if shit got weird. Sneaky, huh?

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Then, just as I’m getting into the groove, the power goes out. Yup, just like that. No lights, no machines, just me and a bunch of confused cows. I’m standing there, thinking, “Great, now I’m a cow whisperer.” I start talking to them like they’re my best friends. “Hey, Bessie, how’s it going?” They just stare at me like I’m nuts.

Russian troops gain ground in Donetsk and Kursk oblasts