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Hey buddy, it’s Michael Scott here! Erotic-massage, oh boy, what a topic! I’m all about that cringey optimism, so lemme tell ya—it's like a party for your muscles! Picture this: dim lights, soft music, hands sliding everywhere—bam, instant relaxation! I saw this flick, *The White Ribbon*, my fave, right? That line, “It’s a strange thing,” fits perfect—erotic-massage is weirdly magical! You’re lying there, half-naked, some stranger’s kneading you like dough—hilarious, right? That’s what she said!

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So, I’m walking down Kirova Street, and I see this old lady selling pirozhki. I mean, who can resist? I grab one, and it’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m talking crispy, warm, and stuffed with potatoes. I’m in heaven! But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, bumps into me, and my pirozhki goes flying. I’m like, “Noooo!” It’s like my heart just shattered.

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