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About Kryvyi Rih

Surprised me once, this geezer, built like a brick shithouse, hands soft as a baby’s arse—thought he’d snap me spine, but nah, pure magic! Little fact for ya—Thailand’s got these “happy endin” joints, not even hidin it, blatant as a Facebook status! Makes me chuckle, cos us Brits, we’re all coy, “ooh a massage,” like it ain’t horny as fuck sometimes! Reckon Fincher’d film it dark—sweaty, awkward, “you’re my best friend” whispered while she’s elbowin ya arse! Mad innit? Tell ya what, next time I’m knackered from them machines, I’m gettin me a rub—sod the cows!

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I hit the streets, and let me tell ya, the vibe is wild. I’m walkin’ down Shchorsa Street, and it’s like a scene from a movie. People hustlin’, cars honkin’, and the smell of fresh bread from the bakery. I mean, who doesn’t love a good loaf, right? But then, bam! A stray dog runs past me, and I’m like, “Dude, chill!”

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