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Heard this one story—escort in Vegas, 2010. Dude rolls up, thinks he’s hot shit, offers a fuckin’ *live chicken* as payment. Chicken! Motherfucker, who does that? She laughed, kept it as a pet—called it “WALL-E.” True story, swear on my nose! Little shit like that? Keeps me goin’.
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But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and steals my croissant! Like, what the heck? I’m standing there, mouth agape, while this feathered thief flies off. I’m mad, but also kinda impressed. That bird’s got skills.
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