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So, I tried it once, right? Dude’s hands were fuckin’ magic— had me floatin’ like I’m on a damn cloud. But then, motherfucker, he goes too far— too much pressure on my damn back! I’m like, “Ease up, asshole, I ain’t a pretzel!” Made me mad as hell, but then— boom— he hits this spot, and I’m melted. Surprised me, shit, didn’t expect that. Reminds me of that line, “You’re gonna regret this!”— ‘cept I didn’t, not one bit.

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After that, I decided to hit up the local market on Shevchenko Street. Man, the vibe there is electric. Fresh fruits, veggies, and the smell of spices everywhere. I’m trying to haggle with this babushka over some tomatoes. She’s tough, man. I swear she’s seen more battles than I have. I finally get a decent price, but she gives me this look like I just insulted her family. I’m like, “Chill, lady, it’s just tomatoes!”

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