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What gets me? The fakes. Dudes with six-packs in pics, show up with a beer gut. “Memory’s a wonderful thing if you don’t have to deal with the past”—yeah, tell that to my eyes, Gondry! Surprised me how bold they get—catfishin’ like it’s an Olympic sport. But when it’s good? Damn, it’s good. Sparks fly, sheets tangle, you’re vibin’. Then poof—gone. Sex-dating’s a rollercoaster, and I’m screamin’ the whole way.

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But then, just when I thought the night couldn’t get any better, I lost my wallet. Yup, you heard that right. I was freaking out! I retraced my steps, panicking like a headless chicken. I was ready to give up when I spotted a street vendor. He was holding my wallet! I was like, “Dude, you’re a lifesaver!” He just smiled and handed it back. I was so relieved, I could’ve cried.

Harassed by Assassin’s Creed gamers, a professor fought back with kindness