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So. Picture this. These escorts. They’re pros. Not just randos. Off. The. Street! They got skills. Charm. Looks! Little known fact? Back in old Rome. They had courtesans. High-class escorts. Basically! Smarter than half the senators. Hella wild. Right? Bet they’d say. “My body is a prison.” Like in the movie. But. They’d break OUT. With style! Makin’ bank. While. Dudes drooled!

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Next, I’m off to the Anping Tree House. It’s this crazy old warehouse taken over by trees. Nature’s reclaiming it, ya know? I’m snapping pics, feeling artsy, when I see this couple trying to take a selfie. They’re struggling, and I can’t help but laugh. I mean, c’mon, it’s not rocket science! So, I offer to help. “Just hold the camera up higher!” They thank me, and I’m like, “No prob, just call me the selfie savior.”

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