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But ugh, da creeps! Dis one guy, he message every gal same line: “U up 4 fun?” Bro, it’s noon! I wanna punch him tru da screen. “How do you kill a man who has no life?” – dat’s him, stealin’ my Memento vibes. Lightbulb! Dese apps need filter for “no losers”, ya? I’m dreamin big, I know.

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I set up my stall on the side of Zhongzheng Road, and man, the crowd goes wild. I’m shouting, “Fresh fish! Get your fresh fish here!” But then, this lady comes up and starts complaining. “These fish look small!” she says. I’m like, “Lady, you should see the ones that got away!” But I just smile and nod. Gotta keep it cool, right?

Update | Taiwanese officials defend letting TransAsia plane fly in wake of typhoon after 48 die in…